Local woman relieved to learn Sharp’s emergency appendectomy didn’t leave scars on his face
"Oh my god. How's his face?" asked Jacquelyn Witkowski of Barrington, a self-described "jersey-chaser" who's never met Sharp or any of his teammates. "They didn't have to cut his face, did they?"
Cam Newton’s father admits his son has been given millions in cash to play...
Following a record-breaking debut by rookie QB Cam Newton Sunday, the Carolina Panthers were rocked by allegations that Cam's father Cecil Newton sought substantial sums of money in return for his son playing for a major professional team.
‘Undercover Boss’ backfires as Redskins backup QB Daniel Snyder killed by Giants defense
Tragedy struck the popular CBS reality show "Undercover Boss" Sunday afternoon when Redskins owner Daniel Snyder, posing as a backup quarterback for the team, was killed in the final seconds of the first half during Washington's game against the Giants.
NFL, ESPN agree to eight-year extension of Jon Gruden crotch shots
At the announcement, ESPN addressed the situation: “We’re aware of the concern, but Jon Gruden carries a considerable fan club of strange women over 40 and that demographic can’t be ignored.”
Fantasy experts agree: You’re a complete idiot if you didn’t start Randall Cobb last...
"You could comb through my archives and see that I never mentioned Cobb in any of my 75 insightful preseason posts this summer," wrote Yahoo! Sports Fantasy Football Reporter Cody Findlay. "But this morning I'm going to go on the record and boldly state anyone who didn't play Cobb last night is a true moron."
Eli refuses to wear helmet, wants to be injured just like his big brother
“It’s so annoying,” said Eli during a press conference Thursday. “Peyton gets all of this attention because of his stupid neck. I have a neck too! I can get hurt too! You watch. I know I can get hurt."
Boorish Score broadcaster Dan Bernstein bolts to start SmartySports.com
“Let’s face it,” said Bernstein. “I am so much smarter than everyone that calls in and is employed by the station. I went to Duke for God's sake. How many times can you listen to knuckle scraping fans cry about Greg Walker or chortle 'Da Bears' before your brain shrinks to the size of a fig?”
