Nebraska players admit being distracted by hectic class schedules
"Man, I've got this killer Sociology final coming up that I've been totally stressing over," said Martinez, who threw two picks in the losing effort.
Big East to add Hamburger University, Clown College, and the School of Rock
The question remains whether the Big East realizes that these are not actual institutions of higher learning with athletic programs, but their interest in them should be of no surprise – it’s money.
Bettman responds to criticism and threats by puffing-out like a blowfish
Experts speculate that the spikes are normally hidden beneath Bettman’s cheap suits, ready to display whenever his species feels cornered.
Jets lineman to IR with butt injury after boneheaded Mark Sanchez play
"Whether or not he needs a colostomy remains to be seen," Whitman said. "We are also running tests to see if Mark is suffering from concussion problems after the play."
NHL cancels holidays, month of December, passing of year
“If we’re going to get serious about playing hockey in 2012, this ticking of time thing has got to stop,” said Bettman. “I decree it perpetually November 21 until further notice.”
Notre Dame to play entire SEC for BCS National Title
With the SEC comprising half of the top ten, the computers have come up with the solution of just having Notre Dame play against all five teams.
Millions of idiot Hoosiers face Indiana University-Notre Dame wardrobe conundrum
Glaxton, like several disloyal Hoosiers, oddly chooses to root for Indiana University’s number one ranked basketball team while also rooting for Notre Dame’s number one ranked football team.
