Texas

While some are complaining that baseball's new expanded playoff format is merely rewarding mediocrity as several .500 clubs chase a postseason spot, Bud Selig is so in love with the new setup that he's opening up the playoffs to all but two teams next season.

At approximately 10:03 EST, Wednesday night, Yahoo! Sports reported that its fantasy football servers crashed for approximately 25 minutes after over 8 million searches occurred for one player: Kevin Ogletree.

It became apparent over the weekend that the Cubs suddenly noticed the value of their partners in shame when thousands of bouquets of flowers appeared around Minute Maid park with notes that read: “Gonna miss u. Baby plz don’t go."

Team names are fun, but they don't always accurately reflect a franchise's players and fans. Here at The Heckler, we've created a few alternate names and logos that are more descriptive of the teams they represent.

Even though the Cubs managed to trade Dempster to the Rangers for two minor leaguers, Theo Epstein is said to be miffed by Dempster's stubbornness at nixing the Braves deal and promises to bring him back to the Cubs next season as retribution.

The Rangers created this debacle by sending Hamilton to the airport to welcome the new Ranger. Following a brief ride back from the airport, Hamilton exited the limousine wearing a Nolan Ryan jersey, spewing line after line about "letting pitchers stay in for 150 pitches" and "giving Robin Ventura a beat down."

The Cubs trade of catcher Geo Soto to the Rangers earlier this week was barely headline-worthy material for fans, but another segment of the city's population is reportedly "despondent" at the news.