Charlotte

“MJ and I were kicking back one night talking about what our dream jobs would be," said Rose. "He confessed that he always wanted to be a beer vendor. So I asked him, why not?”

“Man, I thought I was there to be an invited guest,” guard Kemba Walker told the Charlotte Observer. “As soon as I arrived at the reception hall, they put a dinner jacket on me and handed over a platter of bacon-wrapped chestnuts.”

A team of retired NBA All-Stars, who played in the 1950s and '60s, beat the Charlotte Bobcats in a postseason exhibition route, 153-74, at Time Warner Cable Arena.

Fantasy football specialists across the country run the risk of pleasing or disappointing millions of followers each week. When each supposed “expert” makes his picks, literally millions of fantasy football players are hanging onto every word. That’s why this week, fantasy gurus everywhere are elated at the proposition that Cam Newton has to sit out.

“They have talent,” said Jordan of Team USA. “But I'd like to see those All-Stars who never play with each other develop a rapport fast enough to not only deal with the Puerto Rico's and Germany's of the world, but also the Charlotte Bobcats. Guys like Bismack Biyombo, Kemba Walker and Matt Carroll go out there and fight and sweat for one another. They could mop the floor with this Team USA.”

Following a season that produced just seven wins, the Bobcats are focusing on acquiring talent this off-season. However, being completely devoid of the ability to assess actual NBA talent, owner and "Space Jam" star Michael Jordan has decided to call on some of his old friends to revamp the franchise Monstars, which were featured in the film.

“I'm just tired of playing basketball here all by myself and need to move out of this place,” said Jordan. “So I would like to give the opportunity for someone to play me in a game of HORSE, and if they beat me, I will give my home away free of charge.”