Miami Heat arena remodeled to resemble Death Star
“I can’t say enough good things about the new arena,” Heat star LeBron James said. “The design perfectly captures what me, D-Wade and Chris [Bosh] are trying to accomplish with this team.”
Jose Reyes demands trade after first tour of Marlins Park
“I have no idea what the hell happened,” said Marlins owner, Jeffrey Loria. “He loved the fish tank behind home plate, but as soon as we walked into the outfield it was like he saw a ghost.”
Marlins hire team of Austrian psychiatrists to study Ozzie and Zambrano
Warned not to get too close to the action, each doctor will be armed with two cans of mace and a stun gun should things get too crazy. It sounds extreme, but the volatile nature of Guillen and Zambrano require extreme caution.
J.R. Smith’s new haircut is a secret jab at LeBron’s hairline
“Son’s barber must have slipped up, he shoulda went to my dude, Andre in Bensonhurst” said Knicks fan Mookie. “Twenty minutes, he’d have him looking fresh.”
Cespedes signed with A’s because he thought he’d get to work for Brad Pitt
Earlier this week, the Oakland A's swooped in and basically stole coveted Cuban sensation OF Yoenis Cespedes, who accepted a four-year, $36 million deal. Of the teams apparently interested in signing him (the Cubs, White Sox, Marlins and Tigers among them) the Athletics were the surprise winner.
Mets buy Jose Reyes’ hair for $10,000 on eBay
The hair will make a perfect addition to our Mets Hall of Fame,” said the Mets owner. “Just because Jose has moved on, doesn’t mean we won’t honor his years in New York.”
Gangs back Buehrle’s crusade to allow pit bulls in Miami-Dade County
Heads of several Miami gangs, including the Dogg Pound, the King Garden Boys, and the Jamaican Posse, have rallied around Marlins pitcher Mark Buehrle providing him with support and security as he leads the charge to overturn a long-standing law banning pit bulls in Miami-Dade County.
