Midwest

With Jay-Z retiring last year and Eminem looking to hang up his tracksuit, there just might be room in "da house" for Bulls guard Kirk Hinrich. Going by the name, CAPTAIN K.I.R.K., Hinrich hopes to follow in the footsteps of other great rap stars who began their careers as athletes, like Shaquille O'Neal and the '85 Bears. But if Hinrich's first effort is any indication, this gangster needs a little more "shizzle."

Carlos Zambrano has positioned himself as the Cubs ace heading into the 2006 campaign. He recently signed a one-year $6.5 million deal that sets the stage for a huge payday next year. Read on as Zambrano shares his enthusiasm for the coming season, his goals for the year, and what it's like playing for Dusty Baker.

Thank you, Barry Bonds. Now I may have company in the "this guy is such a jerk, we won't elect him to a Hall of Fame that already has Ty Cobb as a member"-class of MLB greats. If you want to grab lunch sometime, give me a call. We can discuss ways to get back at Selig. I've always been a big fan of flaming bags of dog poop on his doorstep, but I'm open to suggestions. In the meantime, let's gamble!

Former Minnesota Timberwolves guard and noted coach-choker Latrell Sprewell ducked into the St. Mary Magdalene soup kitchen last week and was scolded by volunteer staff for trying to steal a five-gallon pot of minestrone.

Milwaukee Bucks forward Toni Kukoc has been a part of many big games. Known as the "European Michael Jordan," Kukoc was named European Player of the Year three straight times before starting his NBA career with the Bulls in 1994. He played a big role during the second Bulls' three-peat, coming off the bench to pour in 13 points per game during their championship runs.

The vaunted Chicago defense did their best to preserve their honor by stating they would, one week after games actually matter, lead the NFC to victory in the Pro Bowl. Embarrassed on their home turf by Carolina's offensive outburst nearly one month ago, led by wide receiver Steve Smith, in the divisional playoff round, the Bears All-Pros have decided to draw a line in the sand of the beaches of Hawaii.

Amidst yet another losing season following the retirement of Michael Jordan, members of the Chicago Bulls have been searching hard for that silver lining.