Michigan

The sport of baseball, heralded as an American pastime invented by and for Americans, was knocked on its rear end today when a Major League pitcher named “Benoit” representing the great American city of Detroit relieved Justin Verlander.

"A lot of people assumed we'd do something that made sense like split the teams up by geography or name them after our most famous alums, but why take the logical route?" said commissioner Jim Delany. "And there's no way we're changing it, no matter how stupid even our most die-hard supporters believe it to be."

“For the safety of our residents, we have closed all Chicago bars and alcohol-serving restaurants in the anticipation of Miguel Cabrera in town,” said Emanuel. "This city is in enough trouble as it is. We can't risk the sort of physical damage an intoxicated Cabrera could do after another late-night bender."

EA Sports announced Madden ’12 will include concussions. Here are the top 10 other new features.

Jalen Rose created a stir last month when he referred to black Duke players as "Uncle Toms" during a documentary about his Michigan "Fab Five" team from the early 1990s. Today he's issuing an apology for his comment after finally being told what an Uncle Tom actually is.

Wisconsin, Northwestern, Michigan, Michigan State and Penn State are all looking for new homes Saturday evening after the Big Ten announced it was dropping the five schools for their part in the conference getting swept in its New Year's Day bowl games.

Just minutes after the NHL moved Saturday's Winter Classic back eight hours due to weather issues in Pittsburgh, commissioner Gary Bettman announced a change to the 2012 showdown, whose host city has yet to be announced.