White Sox

I'm sick of it becoming a media event every time I talk about what I've bet on. So let's get it all out of the way. While managing the Reds, I bet on baseball, junior high softball games, cock fights, who shot JR, two-week old Chinese food, the Oscars, high school elections, hobo fights, where Marge Schott's dog would deuce next, players' STD test results and the drinking games at local fraternities. Actually, the only thing I won't bet on is the stock market. My bookie offers the only retirement plan I need. Let's gamble!

Two White Sox players got their first home runs of the year in a 6-4 win over the visiting Rangers Thursday night, earning their team a much-needed series victory.

One of the first phone calls Sox pitcher Mark Buehrle received after his no-hitter and following trade to the Cardinals was from his new teammate, first baseman Albert Pujols, who offered to help the pitcher move to his new home.

While White Sox nation rejoiced its first no-hitter in 16 years, the pitcher who tossed it was packing his bags. Mark Buehrle barely had time for congratulatory hugs from his teammates before he was summoned to general manager Kenny Williams' office. It was there Buehrle found out he had been dealt to the St. Louis Cardinals for two low-level minor league prospects.

Sox manager Ozzie Guillen spent most of Wednesday clarifying statements he made the previous night about Sammy Sosa, stating he didn't want to hit the slugger, but instead force Sosa to "have to hit" when at bat. These statements were ignored when Mark Buehrle walked Sosa in the fifth inning, infuriating the manager despite Buehrle's no-hitter, the first for the Sox in 15 years.

Finding yet another way to swindle cash back into the stingy franchise, Bears CEO Ted Phillips slapped Nathan Vasher with a $100,000 fine after he saw the cornerback working out at Halas Hall in a Chicago White Sox cap. Phillips got the idea after he heard of the NFL's fine to Brian Urlacher for wearing a "Vitamin Water" hat during a media session during Super Bowl week. Urlacher's a partner in the company, which is a direct competitor of Gatorade, a $75 million NFL sponsor.

A scoreless first few innings to start, a random solo home run in the middle and a bullpen collapse at the end. Tuesday night's game had just about all the markings of a typical White Sox loss, with one exception: Sammy Sosa.