Crabby Cubs fan still upset Heyward couldn’t properly lay down that bunt
"The Cubs are so lucky [Jason] Heyward's botched sacrifice bunt didn't blow the game for them," said Briedman. "I don't know Maddon thinks his team can get out of the next round with a $180 million guy who can't even properly lay down a bunt."
Hunter Pence returns to full-time job as creepy clown
A day removed from the Giants' NLDS elimination, San Francisco right fielder Hunter Pence has already transitioned to his full-time job as a creepy clown.
"This baseball thing is just to a hobby," said Pence....
David Ross unretiring
"No way in hell am I calling it quits," a beer-soaked Ross said while taking a break from celebrating the Cubs' thrilling comeback NLDS victory over the Giants with his teammates. "This is just way too much fun."
Rahm scalps his remaining Cubs playoff tix to balance city budget
"Everyone made a big deal about the playoff tickets I was able to buy at face value," said Emanuel. "Little did all those idiots know it was all part of my plan to fix this city's broken financial situation."
Bears coach refuses to rule out Sayers and Butkus for Sunday’s game
“I know they both want to play. I am not a doctor, so I am not going to speculate, but with advances in medical technology, I can’t rule anyone out at this point,” Fox told reporters during a conference call Wednesday.
Jay Cutler injures his smoking hand
With ligament damage sustained in his right thumb, there's no guarantee that Cutler will be able to work the lighter and take a drag the next time he needs to get down with a good puff.
Cubs clinch 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019 NL Central titles
"Look, any time you wrap up a division title for the next four years it's a big deal," said Maddon. "These young guys need to get used to this sort of thing as it's pretty clear we're going to be winning these titles for a while."
