Pujols mocks Derrick Rose over paltry 5-year deal that ‘doesn’t screw fans at all’
"What a moron!" exclaimed Pujols. "I'm like 20 years older than him and I got myself a 10-year, quarter billion dollar deal! He didn't even bother to screw over all his devoted fans. Such a joke."
Bulls sign WWI vet to play alongside Hamilton
In the wake of the Chicago Bulls signing guard Richard “Rip” Hamilton to the team before the shortened season begins, they shored up the backcourt with a complementary signing of WWI veteran Richard Harrow.
Bulls thrilled to sign ‘team player’ who started a mutiny against his coach last...
Bulls GM Gar Forman praised the team's new SG Rip Hamilton Thursday as a great team player capable of rallying teammates whenever necessary, even when he believes a mutiny against his coach is in order as he did last season with the Pistons.
Rip Hamilton initially reluctant to take over as token old guy on Bulls roster
“He defends and hits the mid-range jumper,” said Thibodeau. “Even more important than that, he drives his kids around in a minivan. Young players on our squad can learn from that.”
South Beach restaurant owners unite to applaud signing of Eddy Curry
"Eddy Curry may be the Eddy Curry of basketball, but he's the Michael Jordan of over-eating," one excitable restauranteur told reporters. "I can't wait for the payday that'll be coming my way the night that he decides to eat at my restaurant."
Knicks owner says to forget Chris Paul; wants to trade for John Lucas
“John. Lucas. The Third,” replied Dolan when asked who his top choice was to add to the Knicks’ roster. “Did you see this guy at Rucker Park? Well I didn’t because I’m afraid to go there, but I saw it on YouTube. He dominated Kevin Durant!”
Boozer breaks hand again after punching wall in excitement over end of lockout
Bulls forward Carlos Boozer will reportedly miss six to eight weeks of action after suffering a “boxers fracture” on his right hand for the second straight year. Upon being informed of the end of the NBA lockout, Boozer supposedly leaped high into the air and then threw a thunderous punch straight into his living room wall.
