Female Blackhawks fan super-pissed she can’t grow a playoff beard
"Sure, I could wear a fake beard made of yarn or something, but it's not the same," she said, despondent. "I honestly don't give a crap about whether it's attractive. I just want to support the team."
Patrick Kane to return with healthy, glorious playoff mullet
"I've worked very hard during my time off to cultivate the flow and get the razors just right on the sides," said Kane. "My mullet will return to the ice in epic, glorious fashion whether we face the Blues or the Avalanche next week."
Blackhawks to face Heat in Stanley Cup/NBA Finals hybrid
"This will finally determine if the Blackhawks have an answer for LeBron James," said ESPN NBA analyst Stephen A Smith. Smith was in full support of the idea, after last year when he claimed that the Heat were more impressive than the Blackhawks.
Anonymous source reveals Toews out for rest of season just so he can watch...
"He's partial to Holmes on Homes and Property Brothers," a source close to the situation claimed. "And don't even get me started on all the episodes of House Hunters and Love It or List It. Wow. That guy has a real problem."
Quenneville refuses to freak out over Toews injury despite chaotic scene
"It's nothing serious," Quenneville said as paramedics streamed past him with Toews on a gurney, clutching at his shoulder.
Giggling Kane to sit out remainder of season to ensure he plays in 69...
"Sure, it's always been a dream of mine to have the number, heh heh, 69 appear in my stat sheet at the end of an NHL season, ever since I was in high school."
Crawford gets game misconduct after calling ‘dibs’ on snowy net vs. Pens
Blackhawks goalie Corey Crawford received a game misconduct for placing two lawn chairs and a garbage can in front of the net during Saturday night's NHL Stadium Series game at Soldier Field.
