Martz agrees to call running plays, but only if they’re wacky double-reverses or something
“We have to protect Jay [Cutler],” said Martz. “And what better way than the triple-flea-flicker-draw? First you think it’s a run, then a pass, then a run … then wait, Jay has it again? Finally Forte runs it right up the gut. Now that’s what I call balance.”
Clay Matthews to braid hair into ‘war pigtails’ for game against Bears
Green Bay linebacker Clay Matthews has announced that on Sunday, for the second time in his life, he will braid his hair into pigtails. The previous braiding was done for some glamour shots he took back in college.
New Facebook design causes Packer fan to briefly hate something more than Bears
Green Bay native Lenny Jensen briefly despised something more than the Chicago Bears this morning when he logged onto Facebook for the first time since its latest redesign.
Despite Green Bay’s championships, most people still refer to ‘Titletown’ as ‘Armpitville’
The Packers won their 13th championship and fourth Super Bowl last season, a fact most of America doesn’t believe is enough to change their nickname for Green Bay from “Armpitville” to ‘Titletown.”
League will allow Cutler to use new SackShield™ against Green Bay
NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has approved the use of a revolutionary new device aimed at protecting Jay Cutler against blitzing defenders.
Flattened Cutler peeled off Superdome turf like giant decal
“I was cleaning the turf like normal, then I saw this big decal of a Bears player on the 40-yard line,” said Bob Benson, a Superdome staffer. “At first I thought it was one of those Fathead things. Then I heard a weak voice begging for help.”
Bears, Saints to retire Kreutz at halftime in New Orleans
In his 13-year career, Kreutz’s production had diminishe of late. “We feel this is the best way to honor him,” said Bears GM Jerry Angelo. “What better way to go out than forcibly and in front of the only two teams he's played for?”
