Bears

"For a few minutes, I was just kind of happy the offense looked good," he said. "I wasn't getting too hyped. But then my buddy called totally freaking out, and I realized this team is obviously going all the way. Undefeated, probably!"

"Every time I talked to Lovie about not using a timeout in the first quarter, he would complain about feeling a burning sensation in his groin area," said Emery. "Once we ruled out, um, other physical issues, we realized the timeouts were literally burning holes right into his trousers."

Play along as the Bears take on the Colts in Week 1 of the 2012 NFL season.

"This really shores up the line and takes a lot of pressure off J'Marcus," said offensive coordinator Mike Tice. "Coaching is about putting players in the position to succeed. If his only role is to give up sacks, the guy can't fail. It's his specialty!"

"In hindsight, I guess it makes sense that injecting Jell-O into a major joint wouldn't solve anything," said Urlacher. "But I wanted to do everything possible before having to go under the knife."

"Well obviously I'm going to use my timeouts like they're going out of style," said Smith. "Because they are. Just the other day [New England Patriots coach] Bill Belichick said he thought timeouts were a thing of the past ... that any good team could function without them. I better use mine up before the league takes them away!"

Bears fan Matt Hunter quickly became enamored with quarterback Matt Blanchard after witnessing the undrafted rookie run a two-minute drill to near perfection.