QB Jason Campbell exiled to Cleveland
“I know I’ve pretty much outlived my usefulness in pro football,” the 31-year-old signal caller said. “But being exiled to a team that’s averaged four wins each year since 1999, no joke, I could last another 5-6 years in this league."
Urlacher’s leadership skills lauded at local bingo hall
Ex-Bear Brian Urlacher turned some heads at a Lake Forest bingo hall this week. The NFL free agent was described as “vocal and vivacious” during a three-hour bingo tournament, loudly informing fellow bingo players where to pick up their cards and where to sit.
No more pouts: Cutler gets Botox after being named face of franchise
"With Brian gone, I have to be the new face of the franchise," said Cutler. "And [GM Phil] Emery told me to smile more. So as a true leader, I took it upon myself to get Botox injections. I'm that committed to this team."
Bears continue Chicago tradition of throwing legends on their ass by parting ways with...
The Bears have decided to end talks with Brian Urlacher. Urlacher joins the ranks of Bobby Hull, Chris Chelios, Mark Grace and Mike Ditka as Chicago legends thrown on their asses by their long time team. No word yet on if the Bears will decide to nose dive for years, like the other Chicago franchises.
Bears GM searches couch cushions for way to pay Urlacher
"I mean, I'm really going to dig around in there, in the crevices and everything," said Emery. "I don't think Urlacher will feel slighted at all during this process, especially after he sees what turns up."
Cutler rushed to hospital with suspected case of Bieber Fever
Cutler was unavailable for comment but reports of him singing "Baby" non-stop in the hallways has new coach Mike Trestman concerned.
Jay Cutler obsessively checks your Facebook page to see what you think of him
"When I found out I was one of the most disliked athletes in sports, it really hurt," said Cutler. "I mean, I totally care what people think of me ... especially you. One kind status update from you would be like the sun on my heart for a thousand years."
