Bears

Only nine weeks into the 2010 season Bears offensive coordinator Mike Martz has given up on his budding bromance with quarterback Jay Cutler.

Die-hard readers of The Heckler might have noticed it's been about eight weeks since we published our last issue. The Heckler's supposed to be monthly and eight weeks sure ain't monthly. So, yeah, we're a little off, but there's a reason: Our new web site. We totally relaunched theheckler.com and you should check it out if you haven't already.

Several Bears players have been reported missing north of the border after a close, hard-fought win against the winless Buffalo Bills in Toronto. Coach Lovie Smith said he heard the players are attempting to defect to the Canadian Football League due to frustrations over the team's prospects for the rest of the season.

Vikings head coach Brad Childress awoke to find his front yard covered with toilet paper this morning, marking the 1,000th time the 54-year-old has been targeted by vandals.

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The Vikings' disappointing season took another surprising turn Monday when they cut all-time leading receiver Randy Moss just four games into his second stint with the team and a month after he was traded from the Patriots. Now Chicagoans are itching for Bears GM Jerry Angelo to sign the moody, aging superstar, who was dismissed from the Vikings in part for showing a lack of heart and not completing his routes during key drives.

On Tuesday night, a group of Chicago Bears were denied entrance to Angels and Kings nightclub in Chicago's Near North Side. There have been rumors that race was behind the decision, but another reason has surfaced.