Michael Vick dog-fighting jokes to result in one-game suspension from Roger Goodell
“It’s not because Michael doesn’t deserve it, and we understand that trash talk is part of our game,” Goodell said. “Every Vick dog pun has been said, so save yourself the embarrassment. And stop with the damn Rex Ryan foot-fetish jokes too while you’re at it.”
Michael Vick celebrates new contract by attending cockfight
After receiving the second $100 million contract of his career, Philadelphia Eagles QB Michael Vick celebrated by spending a night on the town, where he attending an especially atrocious display of cockfighting in the back room of a Philadelphia warehouse.
Quade pencils ‘Excessive Heat’ into lineup for rest of week
After defending National League Cy Young Winner Roy Halladay was forced to leave his start Monday night in the fifth inning at Wrigley Field, Cubs manager Mike Quade declared that Excessive Heat would be penciled in his starting lineup for the duration of the homestand.
Nike unveils controversial new Michael Vick ads
Just days after announcing a new endorsement deal with Mike Vick, Nike has launched a controversial new print campaign tackling the football star's dog-fighting problems head on.
Pittsburgh mascot inserted in lineup in order to draw fans
“We went with Parrot because he won’t scare kids away, like Captain Jolly possibly might,” said the team's head of marketing.
Local man gets congratulatory call from Obama after winning $10,000 Super Bowl pool
Citing a "tireless resolve in the face of hardship and adversity," President Obama congratulated Chicagoan Keith McConnell over the phone Monday after McConnell won $10,000 in a squares pool when the Packers beat the Steelers 31-25 in Super Bowl XLV Sunday night.
Packers, Steelers happy to have been in locker room when Black Eyed Peas performed
Despite several key injuries incurred just late in the second quarter during Sunday's Super Bowl, both the Steelers and Packers said the key positive of being in the locker room at the break was that they were able to avoid Black Eyed Peas eye-gougingly bad halftime show.
