New York State

Employing the same formula that brought them championships in 1997 and 2003, the Miami Marlins announced that they have signed free agents Albert Pujols, Jose Reyes, Mark Buehrle and Ryan Madson and immediately began planning the fire sale that has shortly followed those two World Series titles.

In an effort to make one of its premier teams more exciting, the NFL will allow Giants’ running back Brandon Jacobs to line up next to the opposition’s defensive line effective immediately.

The Jets fell to 5-5 on the season after a last-minute loss to Tim Tebow’s Broncos Thursday night, and Rex Ryan believes a higher power may have had something to do with it. As a result, the outspoken head coach held a closed-door team meeting after the game where he ordered his entire team to attend mass on Sunday.

On the heels of another dismal post-season at the plate, New York right fielder Nick Swisher offered assurances to Yankee fans concerned with the club's puzzling move to exercise his $10.5 million option for 2012.

"This was a no-brainer," said Yankees GM Brian Cashman. "The inactive roster poses a challenge to any professional athlete, and Carl has already demonstrated that he is uniquely capable of dealing with the pressures of inactive roster occupancy. He's also intimately familiar with the hospitals in the New York metropolitan area."

Jets head coach Rex Ryan and his brother Rob, defensive coordinator for the Dallas Cowboys, got together Monday afternoon for their annual "cow lunch," where the duo consumes an entire cow and shares stories about football.

Barber was told to show up at a local high school in the outskirts of Pennsylvania, where he ran drills and caught passes from a 15-year-old quarterback. That’s when things started to get fishy.