Breaking!

During a recent interview with Barbara Walters, Archie Manning revealed that despite having fathered two of the best quarterbacks in recent history, he only really loves the son that wins the Super Bowl that year.

The people around Sandberg can see how pleased he is to be part of an actual baseball organization with a solid foundation and a winning tradition, instead of the Cubs, who focus on giant macaroni noodles and finding C-list celebrities to sing the seventh inning stretch.

To celebrate the Mets' rare visit to Texas, the Rangers unveiled Weiner Night.

“They told me there was a correlation between hilarious last names and inappropriate behavior involving cell phone cameras,” said the stunned knuckler, who has not yet been charged with any wrongdoing. “I didn't even know my phone had a camera.”

Owner Fred Wilpon announced today that the left field wall will be lowered three inches, and moved in two feet towards home plate. The process is believed to be costing the supposedly cash-strapped Wilpons upwards of $120 million.

"Following this monumental defeat of the Cubs, that now gives the White Sox a five-game all-time advantage, I'm relieved we can all name our club the better of the two in this seemingly never-ending struggle," said White Sox owner Jerry Reinsdorf.

In the fifth year of his eight-year $136 million deal Cubs left fielder Alfonso Soriano has been leading the team in home runs, is near the top of the Cubs RBI list, and has been playing better defensively, but apparently he’s missed the one thing he learned to embrace his last first years in Chicago: booing.