So far, Roquan Smith has done a good job of making sure his Twitter presence is appropriate, and he isn’t causing any PR problems for the Chicago Bears. He appears to be very committed to being a successful linebacker in the NFL, and is careful about his social media presence. But could you imagine if he were a controversial figure who used Twitter as his medium? Here are 13 tweets Roquan Smith didn’t write, but could you imagine how crazy it would be if he did?

1.    

Wow! We can’t even BEGIN to list the reasons why this tweet is problematic. This is no way to win over your teammates, coaches, and especially the fan base. Rule No. 1 of being a Bears fan or player, you gotta hate the Packers! It’s a good thing he never actually tweeted this.

2.

Whoa! Roquan Smith hasn’t actually waded into the heated debate over whether LeBron has surpassed Michael Jordan as the greatest basketball player of all time, but wouldn’t it make his relationship to Chicago fans so much more tenuous if he has?

3.

Roquan Smith didn’t actually invite people on social media to steal his electronics, especially one that had the playbook on it. In reality he was the victim of a robbery that was no fault of his own. However, if this had happened, it is obvious that Bears fans would have had severe doubts about his intelligence.

4.     

Holy Cow! Roquan Smith hasn’t actually demanded to play QB for the Bears, which would create locker room tension between him and Mitch Trubisky going into off-season workouts, but if he had, it would have been a disaster for the Bears, who can’t afford to have their second-year QB’s confidence shaken.

5.

Bears fans would have a right to be worried if the first thing Roquan Smith did when he got to Chicago was eat several metric tons of processed meat. Luckily for them, Roquan Smith did not tweet this, and is likely not going to do this until after he retires.

6.     

One of the most exciting elements of Roquan Smith is the fact that he has a very solid track record of off-the-field behavior. If he were to tweet this, it would create a scandal that would rock the sports world for years! Now let’s just hope it isn’t actually true…

7.  

Wow, that’s scary to think about! Bears fans have been burned recently by promising draft picks being derailed by injuries. However, Bears fans can sleep soundly tonight knowing that, as of now, none of the terrifying and vengeful Old Gods have handed down prophecies that Roquan Smith will be on IR at any point. Or at least if they have, he hasn’t tweeted about it.

8.

The problem with twitter, especially when you have loads of followers, is that in an instant, people can take screenshots, which makes it impossible to fully delete a mistaken tweet from existence. If Roquan smith had leaked the Bears’ highly detailed gameplans, they would stand no chance against NFL offenses!

9. 

No, Roquan! A hasty and misspelled statement that he doesn’t like football would be a bad omen for the Bears, who have Smith under contract to play for them for the next four years. It’s a good thing Roquan Smith has not tweeted that at any point.

10.

Whoa! Twitter has no place for NFL stars tweeting broad accusations about the conduct of Operation of Iraqi Freedom, which happened when Roquan Smith was 8. Good thing he didn’t do that.

11. 

Wow! Thank goodness the potential cornerstone of the Chicago Bears defense didn’t actually take this controversial stance against a man generally considered to be one of the better political leaders of the 20th Century!

12. 

Oh my! It would be a disaster for the Bears if Roquan Smith accidentally tweeted out America’s nuclear launch codes, as that would be an unparalleled national security crisis. Luckily, Roquan Smith is a linebacker, and does not have access to the nuclear launch codes. Therefore, he could not have tweeted them out.

13.

Thank GOODNESS Roquan Smith didn’t write this…this would have sent his draft stock plummeting, at least into the third round. I don’t think any team would actually want a player who posts this on social media anywhere near their starting lineup. He’d be such a PR nightmare! It’s such a relief Roquan smith didn’t actually tweet this.

By Mitchell Trachtenberg and Michael Pattis