The legal eagles at Major League Baseball are filing a lawsuit against Cubs second baseman Javy Baez after seeing their logo tattooed on the back of the rookie phenom’s neck.

“While we appreciate Mr. Baez’s enthusiasm for our league, it is a violation of our trademark to recreate it in any way without the express, written consent of Major League Baseball,” said MLB General Counsel Robert Paschke. “Unfortunately, this gives us no choice but to take legal action.”

Paschke said he hoped Baez would either get the tattoo removed or face damages “in the mid-seven figures.” Since Baez isn’t making huge money just yet, a multi-million dollar settlement would be prohibitive for him.

In addition to seeking damages, Paschke offered some advice for Baez.

“In addition to being a trademark-infringement, Mr. Baez’s tattoo is not very high-quality,” said Paschke. “It’s asymmetrical and the coloring seems off. We’d like to recommend another tattoo artist for his future inking needs.”

Paschke said that Commissioner Bud Selig is “heavily tattooed” and gets his work done by one of the best artists in the business.

“We’d gladly put Mr. Baez in touch with Bud’s guy,” said Paschke. “No one ever believes that he’s all inked up because he’s always wearing a suit, but he’s like shoulders-to-toes tattoos. Total freak, our commissioner is.”

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