Last night’s prime time matchup between the Minnesota Vikings and New York Giants was the final nail in the Monday Night Football coffin, resulting in the immediate cancellation of the football program after a 43-year run.

“Popularity in the program has been declining for years, but not being able to flex out of an abysmal matchup of the two worst football teams outside Florida is a franchise-killer,” said TV industry analyst Bob Holloway. “You can’t feature a game like this and expect to survive it. I hate to invoke the tired ‘jumping the shark’ cliche, but a snap poll of ESPN viewers revealed most of them would rather have seen Henry Winkler quarterbacking the Vikings than Josh Freeman.”

According to Monday Night broadcaster Jon Gruden, the cancellation is welcome.

“So what if I lose my job?” he barked. “These two teams are terrible. I just don’t understand how a network can put out a product like that when it’s crunch time! Monday night was your chance to shine, ESPN, and you blew it. I just don’t get it. Awful!”

hecklerstaff