It has been rumored for weeks that one of the coaches the Bears will reach out to in the coming days is Mike Shanahan. Shanahan is known for being the only coach who got current Bears quarterback Jay Cutler to play at a Pro Bowl level.
This rumor recently picked up steam when a janitor at Halas Hall found what appeared to be a rough draft of a song that George McCaskey wrote for Shanahan. It is unclear at this point if McCaskey was planning to sing the song himself or hire a professional singer to do the honors. Bears fans have taken this as another sign that McCaskey may not be in the right state of mind to be running an NFL franchise. Printed below is the rough draft of the song McCaskey wrote.
Blank Check (sung to the tune of Blank Space by Taylor Swift)
By George McCaskey
Nice to meet you, where you been?
I can show you incredible things
Jeffery, Forte, Marshall, Long
Saw you there and I said
“Vir-gin-ia, look at that face
He looks like our next big break
If he’s here, will Jay play?”
Here’s money, suit and tie
We will get you on a magazine
Ain’t it funny, rumors fly
And I know you heard about me
So hey, let’s be friends
I’m dying to see how this one ends
Grab your playbook and your pen
You can make the bad Jay good for a weekend
So it’s gonna be forever
Or it’s gonna go down in flames
You can tell me when it’s over
If the job was worth the pain
Got a long list of ex-coaches
They’ll tell you I’m to blame
But you’re gonna love our players
And they love the game
Our D’s young and it’s reckless
Not sure it’ll take us far
We’ll leave Chi breathless
Or with a nasty scar
Got a long list of ex-coaches
They’ll tell you I’m to blame
But I’ve got a blank check Mikey
And I’ll write your name
Big arm strength, touchdown throws
Jay will show you incredible things
Pocket scrambles, perfect show
You’re the coach Mikey, he’s your fling
Find out what you want
Be our coach for a month
Wait the worst is yet to come, oh no
Inter-ceptions, fumbles lost
Jay will make all the tables turn
Stupid plays, pouty face
Keep you second guessing like
“Oh my God, who is he?”
Rodgers will provoke jealousy
But Jay’ll be back when each coach leaves
‘Cause Mikey, Jay’s a nightmare dressed like a daydream
So it’s gonna be forever
Or it’s gonna go down in flames
You can tell me when it’s over
If the job was worth the pain
Got a long list of ex-coaches
They’ll tell you I’m to blame
But you’re gonna love our players
And they love the game
Our D’s young and it’s reckless
Not sure it’ll take us far
We’ll leave Chi breathless
Or with a nasty scar
Got a long list of ex-coaches
They’ll tell you I’m to blame
But I’ve got a blank check Mikey
And I’ll write your name
Bears’ fans only know years of torture
Don’t say I didn’t say I didn’t warn ya
Bears’ fans only know years of torture
Don’t say I didn’t say I didn’t warn ya
So it’s gonna be forever
Or it’s gonna go down in flames
You can tell me when it’s over
If the job was worth the pain
Got a long list of ex-coaches
They’ll tell you I’m to blame
But you’re gonna love our players
And they love the game
Our D’s young and it’s reckless
Not sure it’ll take us far
We’ll leave Chi breathless
Or with a nasty scar
Got a long list of ex-coaches
They’ll tell you I’m to blame
But I’ve got a blank check Mikey
And I’ll write your name
Credit to Jon Greenberg (@jon_greenberg) for pointing out on Twitter how a few lines of this song worked well for Jay Cutler. I just took his idea to an insane level.
