With so much going on in Chicago’s topsy-turvy sports world, The Heckler’s July issue is here to help you make sense of it all.
It’s not been a good first half for the North Siders and The Heckler’s here to break it down for you. Read about the first-place White Sox here too.
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Among this issue’s headlines
Crosstown Classic
Zambrano gets straitjacket; Troubled hurler spewing new ‘Hell Pitch’ with his mouth
Cubs discipline Big Z by making him continue to pitch for them
Wrigley retail project broom closet to house Cubs Hall of Fame
Remorseful Ricketts asks if he can exchange Cubs for Rangers
Cubs add empty seat surcharge to season ticket holders
Aramis to take part in All-Star cockfighting tournament
Fan chooses to watch paint dry instead of Cubs game
Woo-Woo gets vuvuzela; Cubs mascot defies logic and finds way to become even more annoying
Soriano’s baseball IQ drops to .086
Cubs replace clubhouse sauna with cesspool
Fans scrape up $15,000 to send current players to ‘Cubs Fantasy Camp’; Soriano, Ramirez
and Lee targeted as ‘slackers’
Piniella uses cardboard cutout of Ricketts to motivate team; ‘With every win, we rip
off a piece of clothing’
Aramis to try out for NBA; ‘I love the 82-game season’ says oft-injured third baseman
A Heckler Exclusive: Rebuilding the Cubs; We asked some key Cubs personnel how they would fix the team. Their answers might surprise you
Woo-Woo in History: 1898 with Teddy Roosevelt’s Rough Riders
Man proud to be last Cubs fan with faith in Jim Hendry
Cubs officially impossible to watch sober
White Sox News
Sox fan gets exploding scoreboard-influenced spinners as rims on Camaro
Mugging victim: Being a Sox fan not quite worth it
Sox asked to give Cup back to BP as a possible containment device
All-Star Game 2010
Fan excited for 2010 Major League Of Baseball Players All-Star Game In Anaheim Of Orange County
Angels’ Rally Monkey is drugged even more than usual to prepare for All-Star festivities
Blackhawks News
Quenneville’s mustache traded to Vancouver
Toews, Kane stuck in permanent action-figure pose after hoisting Cup
PBS lands exclusive rights to NHL coverage; Fights abolished, analysis to focus on economic impact of foreign players
BP Cup handler dreams of being Stanley Cup handler; Those cool white legs gloves make it look dignified
Huet loses Stanley Cup; Backup goalie drops famed trophy between his and into open manhole
Bulls/NBA News
LeBron picked Miami because of rule against sex with teammates’ moms
Bulls now set sights on botching a big free agent signing in 2011
Chicago regrets trading Benny the Bull to free up cap space for Still confident ditching Hinrich was the right move
Phil Jackson to coach Lakers on giant TV from living room couch
Bears News
Martz: Bears O better than high school team I was going to coach
Lovie strikes fear into opposing teams with proclamation that ‘Bears will be good’
Screamin’ Johnny Blaze and Loco Rob bring the pain with their award-winning columns
thanks,
Brad Zibung
Founder & Publisher
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